Phillipians 1:6

****being confident of this, that he who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus.****

I have 117 days until I get married. It really seems like a long time away.

Last night, I was able to share with my small group the anxiety and restlessness I have been feeling about waiting for my wedding to come. It has been a stressful drain on me for about the past two weeks. I am weepy a lot and hate Mondays because I know it is the beginning of a week without seeing Chad. I have even started to dread Sunday nights because I had to say goodbye to Chad those nights. I don't know why it has gotten worse as time goes by because normally I get used to changes pretty quickly but the more I'm away, the more I want to stay.

At the same time, I really enjoy work now. I love these kids and I feel like my teaching is reaching some of them. I do feel that I will become a great teacher someday. It's still stressful, but not nearly as stressful as it used to be. So once Tuesday comes around, I'm usually okay because I get distracted. But the Sundays and Mondays? They are rough.

Like I said before, I was able to share my struggles with my small group last night and my worries and Chad and my relationship were prayed over. This morning I left for work, and did not feel the normal dread. I slept better last night than I have in a really long time. They prayed for peace, and I feel peace. How awesome is it to not only see that prayer works but that I am surrounded by prayer warriors. I am so blessed to have the people around me that I do. I know not everyone has that though I wish they did.

For now, I hope I can focus on what I do have and not on what I don't have yet. I pray that I will be focused on the now instead of the future. I plan to focus on loving my fiance instead of just wanting him to be my husband RIGHT NOW.

I'm so glad that God continues to work on me.


There is hope for me yet
Because God won’t forget
All the plans he’s made for me
I have to wait and see
He’s not finished with me yet

I don’t know how but I made it through
It’s one of those things that you’ve gotta do
But I always had a knack for telling the truth

Still wondering why I’m here
Still wrestling with my fear
But oh, He’s up to something
And the farther on I go
I’ve seen enough to know
That I’m, not here for nothing
He’s up to something

So now’s my time to be a man
Follow my heart as far as I can
No telling where I’m ending up tonight
I never slow down or so it seems
But singing my heart it’s one of my dreams
All I gotta do is hold on tight